Last Friday I met with my new trainer and a funny thing happened and made me end up thinking about this topic of honesty ever since..

My old trainer was really bad at keeping record of my progress in the book so we sort of had to start fresh.  He got out his notebook and said
“Do you know your height and weight? I mean…if you don’t want to tell me that’s okay….”

I thought the whole concept of not telling my trainer my weight was just plain silly.  It’s like going to the doctor for an illness but you wont tell him your symptoms.  Why would I not tell him the key reason that I am there to fix?  I actually laughed and took a step back and said “I think its pretty obvious its not a small number..I mean..you can see me!”
He laughed and said it’s very common for women to not tell him their weight because they are embarrassed.   Again this takes me back to..he can see you!

I will admit I do understand the whole being embarrassed of the number.  I know what it’s like to be on the internet and make sure I only show pictures of the chest-area up so that people who don’t know me won’t know I am fat.  I would never just tell anybody my weight!  I will now just to prove a point.  I weigh 197.  That actually made my heart pump just to type that.  But what will it do if I don’t say it?  Me not admitting that number will not make it any smaller.  Isn’t it a silly concept to think that someone would like you until they knew your “number”.  It all goes back to when someone is standing in front of you they can see you.  They can pretty much guess what your weight range might be.  Would telling them that number suddenly make them dislike you?  If it did well..you know exactly where to tell them to go…

This is most definitely something I had to remind myself every time I go to weigh in.  When I see that number it cannot define me or my day.  It cant control feelings.  It’s really just a number..it’s not me!  Also let’s be honest…we have an idea of what that number will be.  When we eat right and work out and got enough sleep..we feel pretty confident that number will be going down.  When we binge on chips and fast food and sat on the couch all week..there’s a good chance that number isn’t going to be so good!  But why can’t we look at that number and accept it?  Of course if you strayed far off plan the number is going up…if you stay on track the number goes down.  Why can’t we be honest when we step on the scale?  Instead of being upset and start the self sabotage and hate talk.

When we have a weird dream dont we all first think “where did that come from!?”
We start to think ‘well, maybe its because I saw that show..I did think about that person..I did hear that on the news..I do indeed like penguins..’

When we step on the scale why cant we just analyze it that way?

“Well I did have a lot of sodium yesterday.  My muscles are sore I may be retaining water.  I should have drank more water. I may have skipped a few servings of vegetables”

Normally week to week its all going to be small changes and not be real weight anyway.  I think we all just need to start being more honest about the changes we see in our “number” and accept that it changes weekly..daily..hourly..and it doesn’t define us!  Everything we do each day has a huge impact on what that number is going to be each weigh in day.  It is time to choose if that number goes up or down..Let’s not lie to ourselves and be shocked when we see it.  Inside you know how you did.  If you did follow the plan perfectly and it didn’t move..then keep going!!  If the number goes up and you don’t want to admit you ate that package of cookies..well then there is more work to be done.  But bottom line..If you can’t admit your number to someone else at least admit it to yourself.